How I Learned That Women Compete for Men
“You are no competition for me,” she said. “He was mine first. It’s not fair!” I screamed in rage. “All is fair in love and war,” she replied. We were arguing over Fred. Her words stabbed me in my heart. I was 14, He was 18. The other woman was 38 – and my mother. It...
First Moon Ceremony
I knew before I knew. Not because she said anything. Not because there were signs anyone else would notice. But somewhere in me, there was the same quiet instinct I’d had felt before birth. A gathering. A preparing. I found myself buying candles, choosing little...
Distance
This blog post was really hard for me to write but here goes nothing, or everything rather. I still struggle with competition and envy between women, but for me it often shows up less like jealousy and more like disconnection. When a woman feels “put together”, I...
What Envy Taught Me
I have envied all my life. Wanting all the things other people had that I believed would somehow make me more worthy, more lovable, more enough. Thinner.Braver.Stronger.Powerful.Articulate.Athletic.Patient.Better at sports, golf, business, conversation, life. I spent...
Taking Pleasure Off the Shelf
I’ve wanted to be a part of Bodysex for the past 35 years, even without ever really knowing what it meant. At 19 years old, I was sitting with my mother watching an episode of HBO’s Real Sex. It was the Betty Dodson “Sex for One” pilot episode that aired in 1990,...
Spring Bodysex Retreat
Leading my spring Bodysex retreat was easeful and sweet. Not on purpose, I’ve ended up with a hot pink, gray, and yellow color theme which makes the space feel rather dreamy. Here are some of my takeaways from the weekend. Participating in a Bodysex Retreat is an...
Motherhood
Motherhood We wrote about our experience with motherhood, whether we have children or not. Browse the links below to read the full post.Parenthood "I wanted 2 daughters, I had one, and I ended up with none,” by ForestI Can Mother Myself "Motherhood didn’t just teach...
Happy to be a Childless Mother
I hold a lot of mothering energy within me. I tend to be a caregiver; nurturing, and supportive while still being able to take charge and make things happen. I don’t know if I naturally hold big mom energy or if I was encouraged to develop it. Both of my parents...
Motherhood Chose Me
I knew I’d become a mother later in life. It’s probably why I never thought about fertility or finding the right partner. If I was going to finish law school and establish a career, then I had to put my personal life on the back burner. Delaying motherhood felt right...
Conscious Motherhood
I never wanted to be a mother. I felt that way since I was a little girl. Perhaps this was related to my childhood and having many siblings from my parents’ marriages. Marriage and childhood weren’t a choice for my grandmothers, and I watched how this affected them....
When No One Protected You: Making Motherhood Decisions After Trauma
When childhood trauma shapes your relationship to safety, motherhood decisions become infinitely complex. This is my journey through fertility struggles, and learning to trust my body’s wisdom about whether I was ready to become the protector I never had. Can I trust...
I Can Mother Myself
The way my whole body softened at the idea was like liquid warmth. “How lucky you are to be such an amazing mom, you already know how to care for yourself, the exact same way you’ve been caring for your kids.” One of my best friends told me this after coming out of a...
Parenthood
Part One: Becoming Parents “Do you get to choose how many kids you have?” my 7 year old niece asked me last week. “Sometimes,” I replied. She cocked her head at me. “I wanted 2 daughters, I had one, and I ended up with none,” I said. Her mouth fell open. ...
The Wise Auntie: Celebrating Childfree Life
Mine is a childfree life… Over time I’ve come to realise that the idea of having children was driven by the societal norm of my era… it was never a desire I had… it was just what I was supposed to do in my 20s. Get married, have kids. In my 20s and early 30s I thought...
Motherhood: I’d Do It All Again, I’d Just Do It Differently
I had two boys, one vaginally and one by C-section. I wouldn’t trade either experience for anything. I will never forget the overwhelming love I felt holding each of them for the first time, lying in that hospital bed, just the two of us, looking into each other’s...