I fully understand that teaching is repetition. So again I repeat: the clitoral body is the primary source of orgasm whether it’s stimulated externally, internally, or both at the same time. I prefer both. Once a woman understands she can have both clitoral stimulation with vaginal penetration, it ends this discussion.
There is no distinction between “vaginal” or “clitoral” or “G spot” orgasms since all orgasms are centered in the clitoris. It doesn’t matter if it’s direct clitoral contact or indirect G spot stimulation. Or even the more illusive deep vaginal thrusting that stimulates the base of the spine, now called the “deep spot.” That orgasm requires an 8 inch penis or a quality silicone dildo. All you guys with average 5 to 6 inch penises erect are SOL on that one.
Back in the seventies, Master and Johnson’s research demonstrated that all orgasms were the result of some form of direct or indirect clitoral stimulation. Kinsey agreed before them as did many ancient cultures. Unfortunately many Americans remain influenced by Freud’s ridiculous theory that vaginal orgasms are superior, an idea that took hold during the Victorian age of extreme sexual repression. It’s kept alive today by organized religions and what some men prefer: a quick fuck similar to masturbating inside a vagina.
The “G spot” orgasm is also indirect clitoral stimulation. We know the urethral sponge that surrounds the urinary tract fills up with blood and becomes erect after being stimulated with pressure applied to the ceiling of the vagina. Or in some cases, the use of a strong vibrator on or near the clitoris also can result in ejaculation. Most women agree that “squirting” is not the same as having an orgasm, although I’m told it feels very nice especially if it accompanies orgasm.
At first, young and old women were asking me how they could learn to ejaculate. Recently, I’ve been asked how can I stop gushing during sex with my partner. After searching thousands of website that describe how to female ejaculate, no where could I find information on how to stop female ejaculation. Instead I was advised to get protective mattress covers and more towels are recommended. No where could I find information on stopping this response for those who find the clean up afterwards a drag.
“A vaginal orgasm” is also indirect clitoral stimulation considering the internal structures of the clitoris. The erectile tissue of the legs and bulbs fill up with blood and become erect during vaginal thrusting with an erect penis/dildo/fingers for up to thirty minutes or more. Also to consider is indirect clitoral stimulation when couples bodies press together. Many women discover that getting on top allows her to press her clitoris into her lovers body.
Following all this complicated physical information, we have to include the mental and emotional state of being “in love.” Romantic Love has been described by some feminists and philosophers as “temporary insanity.” Unfortunately, it’s the most popular sexual fantasy for the largest number of girls and women all over the world: “Some day my Prince Charming will come.”
What’s left out of this conversation is the following information: A woman’s erection takes twenty to thirty minutes of adequate clitoral stimulation for her entire vulva to become engorged. The operating word here is “adequate” and will vary from woman to woman.
The point being that few women are even turned on before they get fucked. Most are getting a few minutes of clumsy clit stim, a few licks from a dry tongue or harsh finger banging. The moment there’s a small amount of lubrication, many lovers dive into the vagina going for a home run. No wonder sex therapists emphasize foreplay and no wonder faked orgasms far out number real ones. When we discover how few women are having orgasms during intercourse it’s obvious to me that fucking is really foreplay for masturbation.
Unfortunately, intercourse rarely if ever lasts long enough to engage the internal clitoris. We forget that for every pre-orgasmic woman there’s a premature ejaculating man. This is one of the primary reasons why men don’t want to know what women want because it would require them to make an effort to learn “come control” which sounds like another job and he’s already overworked.
The other tragedy is that most women don’t understand their sexual bodies either due to the absence of childhood masturbation. This is a time when girls and boys get to discover their orgasmic patterns. Even today, women’s sex information and education is based on the male model of sexual response: A penis ejaculating inside a vagina. This is also the hetero-centric, procreative model that’s supported by organized religions, governments and even Mother Nature who wants to further the species. Some days it seems that women can’t win for losing.
We now have the horrendous job of sexually educating a world that’s under the influence of violence with militant religions and corporations intent on dominating the world. Still, some of us continue to hope that “Mankind” will give peace a chance. Otherwise women will have to take over before we can embrace the Pleasure Principal with Equal Rights and Orgasms for all.
