Envy Undermined My Relationships

Envy Undermined My Relationships

“Everything for you is effortless”, he snarled as I feverishly typed the last paragraph of my history paper due the next morning. Effortless? Did he not see the sweat on my upper lip or that I was wearing my waitress uniform trying to finish before a dinner shift?...
How I Learned That Women Compete for Men

How I Learned That Women Compete for Men

“You are no competition for me,” she said. “He was mine first. It’s not fair!” I screamed in rage. “All is fair in love and war,” she replied. We were arguing over Fred. Her words stabbed me in my heart. I was 14, He was 18. The other woman was 38 – and my mother. It...
Distance

Distance

This blog post was really hard for me to write. but here goes nothing, or everything rather. I still struggle with competition and envy between women, but for me it often shows up less like jealousy and more like disconnection.  When a woman feels “put together”, I...
What Envy Taught Me

What Envy Taught Me

I have envied all my life. Wanting all the things other people had that I believed would somehow make me more worthy, more lovable, more enough. Thinner.Braver.Stronger.Powerful.Articulate.Athletic.Patient.Better at sports, golf, business, conversation, life. I spent...
Envy Is Yang Stagnation

Envy Is Yang Stagnation

I will be taking a slightly different viewpoint on the topic of envy, which is to say, a taoistic one. Taped to my fridge is a chart of yin and yang characteristics. It lists their various balances and imbalances and is a diagnostic tool for understanding how to...
Spring Bodysex Retreat

Spring Bodysex Retreat

Leading my spring Bodysex retreat was easeful and sweet. Not on purpose, I’ve ended up with a hot pink, gray, and yellow color theme which makes the space feel rather dreamy. Here are some of my takeaways from the weekend.  Participating in a Bodysex Retreat is an...