Art titled “Play with Your Body” by Betty Dodson

Today in the news, I saw that Bernie Sanders was a fan of Wilhelm Reich in his college days. This was reported in the Daily Mail, a conservative tabloid. No doubt the spin on the story was negative. But, I thought to myself, where have I heard that name? And there on my bookshelf was The Function of the Orgasm by Wilhelm Reich. I was assigned to read that book as part of my Bodysex curriculum, and it was a thrilling read.

In 1963, Bernie Sanders wrote a 2000-word manifesto laying out the case for sexual freedom. He was critical of the university he attended for barring women from living off campus or having visitors of the opposite sex. I didn’t think it was possible to admire him more than I already did. But here we are.

I bring this up, not to politicize, an already overly politicized moment, but to ask the question: What is the harm of sexual repression? According to Wilhelm Reich, denying the body pleasure or stifling children’s natural curiosity and masturbation might be the cause of illness or even cancer. I am unsure whether there is a scientific basis for that, and I have to say that, as someone who works in healthcare and takes it very seriously.

Instead, I will state clearly what my relationship to pleasure and orgasm is. I have a routine that I follow. It’s daily yoga, which is exercise, but not enough exercise to trigger my Apple Watch’s fitness feature. You know what I’m saying? It’s exercise, but it’s not goal-oriented or backed by an unhealthy relationship to food. It’s about breathing, it’s about getting stronger, and realistically, it’s about trying to avoid the back problems that follow nurses like the plague.

And, if I’m being gratuitously honest, it’s more about the post-yoga routine. There is nothing better in the entire world than activating my core, slowing my breathing, and having an orgasm in Shavasana, or the cool-down part of the yoga practice. Everybody’s favorite pose is Shavasana, or the corpse pose. Masturbating immediately after yoga has revealed a lot about pleasure and orgasm.

That first orgasm is just as much a release as the yoga sequences themselves or even more so. You would think that post-yoga, I’m anxiety-free and my muscles are loose and warm. While there is some truth to that, there is always lingering tension. And if anything, yoga highlights that and demands you pay attention to it. Those first orgasms post yoga require almost no buildup. The release is swift, and that is when I finally give myself the pause to relax.

I’ve seen how this routine has changed my response to very real and serious problems in my hospital workplace. I stay calm and grounded. Even at my other job, bartending, I could be slammed, overwhelmed, and I never let it show. This takes a toll, obviously, having to be the adult in the room, especially us healthcare workers. It’s no wonder we have a reputation for being freaks. I offer no defense; I think there’s a lot of truth to it.

I think Bernie Sanders and Wilhelm Reich were way ahead of their time. Orgasms aren’t going to prevent all misfortune or cancer, assuredly, but it’s no doubt a first line defense when the body or psyche is depleted. I’ve fallen asleep with my mini vibrator still in my pants, and I’m an anxious gal whose brain prevents sleep from being easy. I can’t imagine my life without it.

I’ve met people, men and women, disconnected from themselves, and it’s painful. More painful than I could describe.

I’ve used orgasm and masturbation to ease menstrual cramps. I’ve had orgasms lead to a rush of tears. I’ve had orgasms that softened my anger. I’ve never had an orgasm where I’ve remarked, “Well, I feel worse” afterwards. There’s supposedly no biological reason for a clitoral orgasm. It’s not necessary for procreation and was therefore dismissed until the 1990s. Isn’t there a biological necessity to negate stress and release tension? I sure hope so.

I think it may be the only remedy that works. It’s changed how I date and have sex with other people. It’s changed how I care for myself. It’s prevented me from the kind of depression where you stop taking care of yourself. Because certainly in this day and age, depression is rampant and comes for us all.

At the very least, I hope, as Wilhelm Reich wrote, that orgasm is releasing the tension I’ve acquired from living the reality of working two jobs and completing nursing school. That tension has got to go. It cannot make a home in my body and turn into chronic pain and fatigue. I release it. And I let it go.

Read Articles by Kaylea