I tend to be “one and done” when I orgasm by myself. My first orgasm often feels good enough to “scratch my itch,” release some happy hormones, and relax my body. I usually feel satisfied, so I rarely go for another when I’m alone. Masturbation is usually just part of my day, like brushing my teeth.

If I continue to stimulate myself after my first orgasm, my orgasms that follow become stronger. It usually takes at least three orgasms for me to get to a full body. When this blog topic came up, I realized that it’s been several months since I’ve experienced multiples.

I do enjoy multiple orgasms. For me, the key is motivation to keep going after my first orgasm. It’s easier for me to continue when I’m sharing sex energy with a partner or during Erotic Recess with Bodysex women. I can keep going when I’m by myself, but it takes some planning and effort. That requires me to dedicate time for myself.

The “assignment” of writing this blog post gave me motivation. I had a sex date with myself so that I could write about my experience.

First, I planned a specific day and time. Sundays are my self-care days. I don’t put anything on my calendar and have no agenda of things I must do. Typically, I like to masturbate in the late morning or afternoon. I’m most alert during this time and if I think about sex or feel any tingle of spontaneous arousal, it’s usually mid-day. If I’m tired, it’s much harder for me to connect with my orgasm. So, I chose a Sunday and put my orgasm date on the calendar. I found myself looking forward to my date with anticipation.

When my special Sunday arrived, I prepared for my session after a relaxing morning and lunch. I didn’t shave my legs or pubes, or put on make-up and style my hair, or put on a special outfit like I would for a date with a partner. It’s fine if you like to do these things for yourself, but none of that matters for my orgasm. Instead, I focused on preparing for the things that I liked, things that would bring me pleasure in my body. Things that connected me to my senses of touch, smell, hearing, sight, and taste.

First, I gathered my favorite sex toys. The Magic Wand is my old reliable, but I have plenty of rumbly vibes that give different sensations. Going through the drawers of my nightstand felt like seeing old friends. I took out an assortment of toys, wiped them down, and put the vibes on the charger. They were all laid out on my bed. My clit tingled with interest and anticipation.

Next, I put together a tray of snacks: some nuts, chocolate coconut candy, and a small dish of maraschino cherries. I knew I’d need to hydrate, so I had a glass of sparking water topped with a little tart cherry juice just to make it fancy.

I like good smells, so I found an almond scented candle and almond body lotion. I topped off my Tupperware container with coconut oil, my preferred lube for vulva massage and masturbation. I like that it’s solid, then melts with the heat of my body.

Finally, I needed some music and some erotica to read, just in case I wanted some inspiration for fantasy to keep going. I made sure that my Kindle was charged and pulled up the book that I was rereading, The Claiming of Sleeping Beauty by Anne Rice. The Sleeping Beauty trilogy is an old favorite that I first read when I was in my thirties.

I noticed it was one o’clock when I was ready to start my date. I began with a pleasurable activity that I truly enjoy, relaxing naked outside in the hot tub on my back deck. I kept the jets off at the start of my soak. The warm water enveloped me like a hug. My muscles relaxed. The water supported me as my legs and arms floated upward. I brought out a speaker for music and my Kindle to read my erotica, but I ended up not using either. I closed my eyes and connected with the sounds in nature. The lake waves lapped gently at the shore. Cardinals, blackbirds, killdeer, sparrows, woodpeckers, and Canadian geese called out their songs created a beautiful soundtrack. When I opened my eyes, I looked up at the sky filled with gray lumpy clouds that felt like being under a blanket. Every now and then, some birds would fly across my view. I closed my eyes again and breathed in deeply. The ticket tape of thoughts that can take over my mind were turned off.  I was fully present in the moment, connected with my body and nature. I stayed in the hot tub until I wanted to get out.

After drying myself off, I went up to my bedroom and lit the candle. I turned some music, Rosa’s Self-Love Playlist on Spotify. We’ve played this music during workshops for vulva massage and Erotic Recess so it holds memory of the Bodysex sisterhood and pleasure. My two favorite sensations are smell and touch.  So before I began vulva massage, I rubbed almond scented lotion over every part of my body except for my vulva. I started by with a gentle head and face self-massage and worked my way down to my feet – my favorite body part to be massaged. I gave each foot a turn, propped up on the opposite bent leg so that I could reach easily while reclining on my bed. I touched my body the way that I’d want touch from a lover. After I finished massaging with my hands, I stayed reclined on my bed with my eyes closed. Were there any parts of my body that wanted more attention? I picked up my Magic Wand, turned it on low, then ran the vibe over my neck and shoulders, on the spot where my upper and lower jaw meet in front of my ear, then down to my breasts and nipples. I didn’t rush. I connected deeply with sensations in my body. I felt aroused and eager to touch my vulva.

I rubbed coconut oil onto my outer labia, dipping my fingers in between to get oil on my clitoris and inner labia. I could feel the melted oil dripping down to my vaginal opening and perinium. I grabbed my Wand and put it on low. I started with the inguinal crease (the crack where your thigh meets your body) on each side then made circles going down one crease to my perineum then back up the other crease to my pubic mons. I kept circling the wand, gradually working from the outside in. By the time I reached the slit of my outer lips, my clitoris felt like it was begging for touch. Not yet.

I adjusted my body into a reclining goddess position with the handle of the wand in my feet and the head of the vibe on my vulva at my clitoris. I moved the vibe with my feet and body against the vibe until I found a spot that felt really good. I took deep breaths, squeezing and releasing my pelvic floor muscles, as I rubbed my vulva against the vibe. I focused on the sensation.

A fantasy image popped into my mind. My fantasies don’t present in full stories, just situations and scenes. The situation was that I was a teenage school girl in the principal’s office. I had to lift up my skirt to show my panties, which were wet with my arousal. She stuck her fingers inside my panties and vulva so that my fluids were on her fingers. I was a bad, slutty girl and needed discipline. I was directed to bend over her desk while she spanked me for punishment. It was during my imagined spanking that I had my first orgasm. Each spank sent me another orgasm wave. I continued riding the waves until I’d had enough.

As I stretched out in bed, I felt warm tingles that radiated out from my vulva. My legs felt like rubber. My heart was beating hard. I breathed deeply. I felt warm and relaxed throughout my body. It was stronger than my usual one and done orgasms but it wasn’t a full body.

I looked at the clock. It was about 2:30. I spent 90 minutes connecting with my body for that one orgasm.

I took a break and peed. I needed some hydration and a snack. The sparkling cherry juice tasted so good. I ate a few nuts and chocolate too. I settled in to read my erotica while I snacked. After a page or two, the story wasn’t inspiring me. My mind kept going back to my school girl fantasy. So I stopped reading. If something doesn’t bring me pleasure, I try something else.

After my short rest, I changed my position, still laying on my back but with my legs bent with my feet on the wall between the rails of my headboard. I can drop my knees wide apart so that my outer labia of my pillow pussy opens up more. I have easy access to my clitoris. She was ready to go again. I went back to my assortment of toys and vibrators. The Eroscillator, a clit-focused vibe stood out. Its marshmallow tip felt like a gentle, rumbly fingertip right on the glans of my clit. It felt so good. I stopped before I went over the edge. I wanted some penetration, so I chose the Rave by We-Vibe. It’s a vaginal vibe that also feels good on the clit. I lubed it up and slipped it inside easily. The rumbly sensation hit my urethral sponge. At the same time, I continued with the Eroscillator. The combination felt amazing. My mind went back to my previous fantasy. The school principal (except now she was a nun) told me that I was not allowed to come. I turned everything off and pulled out the Rave. Then I took a little break from clit stim by focusing on penetration with Betty’s Barbell. I moved it in and out with my hand. It felt good and kept my arousal simmering. After the Barbell, I went for the Womanizer. That toy fits over the clit and provides a suction sensation while vibrating. It’s intense, too intense for me to use it first. It felt good today though, after all of the sensations. When I felt my orgasm was imminent, I turned off the Womanizer. This process of building up to an orgasm is called edging. Experience has taught me how my orgasm build-up feels. Practice has enabled me to stop right before I reach orgasm. This practice brings me a bigger orgasm when I finally allow myself to go over the edge.

After my fun playtime with toys, I really wanted that big orgasm. I switched up the music to an Erotic Recess playlist that I use in workshops. The songs have a faster tempo and heavier beat. I went back to my old faithful Magic Wand. I turned it up level three and let myself go. I was back in my fantasy school at an assembly. This time, I was tied to a chair with the head of a Magic Wand on my clit, The principal instructed me to orgasm in front of the entire school. I wanted to be a good girl, but I couldn’t stop myself. I came in front of everyone. Loud, guttural sounds left my body when my huge orgasm came relatively quickly after all of that edging.

After another short break, I went back for another round. Before I started with the Wand, I put in a small silicone butt plug. I actually feel more pleasure around my anal opening than around my vaginal opening. It feels like the curved end of the plug still stimulates my urethral sponge without it feeling too intense like it does sometimes with vaginal penetration. The vibes from the wand carried up into the butt plug. It felt incredible. At one point, I wondered if the intense pleasure that I was feeling from this orgasm build up would be too much. I remember the story of Betty asking Grant if she could die from too much pleasure. It felt so good, I almost stopped myself before orgasm. Instead, I reassured myself. I could trust my body. As soon as I gave myself permission, my orgasm exploded. I felt the sensation coming from my feet and my head to meet in the middle. It was one of the biggest full-body orgasms that I’d ever experienced.

It was almost four o’clock when I looked at my clock. I’d spent close to three hours connected to my body in pleasure. Solo sex is just as good, often even better, than partner sex. I didn’t have to think about anyone else, just me. Multiple orgasms are here for me whenever I want them. I just have to choose to make time. What an incredible gift from the Goddess of Sexual Abundance. Thank you Betty Dodson for showing me the way to self-love.

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