I never met Betty Dodson, but she became my mentor over the years.

When she was 80 years old, she shared a tip I’d never heard: use almond oil to lubricate your hands, nipples, AND vulva before self-pleasure.

Fast forward a few days, and I finally have some alone time.

I decided to try Betty’s advice.

To prepare a sacred space, I lit a candle and misted the bed with fragrant lavender.

And, to shake off the day’s stress, I took a shower.  Afterward, I rubbed my entire body down in almond oil. With every stroke of rubbing in the oil, I said, “body beautiful,” honoring and reconnecting with every inch of myself.

I crawled into bed and positioned myself. I rested my right hand over my heart and cleared my mind with several deep, cleansing breaths.

Then I reached over to the nightstand for almond oil – just enough to rub on each breast – and, with slow, tender strokes, I massaged my breasts. 

Another squirt of almond oil lubricated my hands to massage my inner thighs and the top mound of my vulva. Then, I massaged the crease between the leg joint and the vulva. The crease felt delicious because I could feel my clitoris legs coming alive that area. I was surprised at how my hands moved effortlessly with the almond oil. Every stroke allowed me to fall deeper into myself.

My oily hands searched for a new place. From the top of my vulva, I effortlessly glided down to my vaginal opening…massaging the outer labia and inner labia. My butt and pelvic floor dropped into the soft sheets. 

My finger tickled my pulsing clit. 

Then, my fingers penetrated deeper and deeper to a spot I had never before felt in my self-pleasure practice. 

Ah, the ease. The flow. Yaaaasss. Exquisite pleasure!

Each time I wanted to come, I breathed into the pleasure and pressed my hips down into the bed. The slip from the almond oil felt better than any water based lubricant or baby oil.

Deep moans. Hard nipples.

My vulva was so juicy, so turned on, so wet that my legs opened more and more — to that spot, whatever it was, asking for more strokes, hard, long strokes. 

With one last deep breath, I moaned and shook. Then BOOM I orgasmed hard. A wave of calm and satisfaction washed over me.

It was the profoundly satisfying orgasm—the kind I’d only experienced a few times in my life.

I’m not a smoker, but at that moment, I could’ve had a cigarette. LOL.

When I rolled over, I was surprised that I enjoyed 40 minutes of unapologetic self-pleasure thanks to that almond oil! Betty’s tip was simple, yet it significantly opened a new portal to deeper, more profound pleasure.

Today, using almond oil is a regular part of my sex sessions – alone or together.

Betty was the exact opposite of me as it relates to age and race, but I believe she was right about sex: 

1. Almond oil is the missing ingredient.
2. Self-pleasure is the basis for self-love and acceptance. 
3. Basic education and tools (like almond oil!) can transform a woman’s sex life. 

Betty, I respect that you shared your tips and marched for sex for an entire lifetime. Through the creation of Bodysex and your blog, you helped liberate not only me but countless women and expand our collective pleasure with simple education and tools. For this, I am thankful!

Tosh is currently in training as a Bodysex Leader. 

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